How to Show the Work and Not be Afraid

Hello Reader,

I’m glad you’re here.

I’m not going to make this any big thing, just take the first step to actually doing this. By this I mean showing my work online (writing, art, ideas, cooking, travel, etc. and the etc. of the etc.). My whole life I’ve dealt with social anxiety due to certain events that happened in my childhood and continued through my life. I’ve been afraid of the world and the people in it. It made me stop venturing outward. I went inward, but I had no outlet all that was left for me was a white page. So I wrote. I spilled my guts onto that white page filling it with all the black I carried in my heart that I had nowhere else to put.

I have been around the world and back again emotionally, physically, and socially. I thought I wanted to be a TV writer and I got to the cusp of it and realized the sacrifice wasn’t worth it. I liked making things, but that wasn’t confined to a Final Draft file. I wanted to connect the dots in a world that seemed so fragmented. To break it down to its pieces and put it back together again simple and healthy.

I’ve been afraid of putting my full self out there out of fear that I wouldn’t belong anywhere. That I’d be rejected and then know I didn’t have a place. I have a problem with public speaking or performed speaking, but I’m working on it. I don’t want to feel like my voice is constantly speaking in questions as if I I’m questioning if I should be talking at all. I want to talk like I’m putting my stake in the ground. I want to put less pressure on everything and that requires me to be messy in public and accept the criticism because I need to not be afraid of it anymore. I need to learn how to live with the hurt and choose to keep going.

After a decade in Hollywood I saw a bunch of my friends do the stand up route. The amount of nerves it took to get up there always impressed me and once they got off the stage they had this euphoria. This lightness. The freedom of knowing the scariest thing didn’t kill them.

So, I’m ready to not die. I mean, I’ve managed until now and I’m tired of being afraid. This is the blog post to christen this new step. I’m going to try to keep it up everyday talking about musings and my experiences, really, whatever is on my mind. No matter the misplaced commas, the fear, the attention, any of that.

I am Kyle Cords. I’m a creator of companies, podcasts, apps, experiences, and all the little things that connect all those together.

Thank you for being here with me.

hugs,

kyle